Beginnings

How to start this post?

It's almost as difficult as starting a blog to begin with. I would imagine that a hefty percentage of people who set up blogs give up before they even start, because they simply can't think of how to begin.

Beginnings are always terribly irritating patches of time, aren't they? Even when the start of something just seems to meld into the middle, the beginning is harder, and you can't really define what becomes easier except to shrug and offer "I suppose I got used to it."

The first beginning of my seminary year was, thank G-d, an atypical initiation into the rocky seas of Semiindependant Living. After the initial flush of applications, interviews and results of last year, the white gloves of description seemed to slough off the palms of our encouragement squads, and their smiles became rather like badly brewed coffee. "You'll hate the first two weeks," they said matter-of-factly, and my stomach dropped. "Oh, but the rest is all worth it! "Wonderful," I thought. "With my emotional clock, that means I'll be sobbing into my pillow for six months, and by the end of year banquet I'll be thinking "Well, this might work!"

Of course, it wasn't easy. It's astounding how quickly one forgets how to make friends when you've been surrounded by the same faces for years, and it's slightly disturbing how insignificant details can turn into major points of tension with roommates who really are very nice people. There are girls I don't like, and meals I can't eat, and hills (literal and figurative) that I can't climb yet. But there are also new and unique friends, the discovery that I really can do my own laundry, and stores of strength I never thought I possessed. I have learned about myself- I never thought I was particularly practical before I went to Israel, or that I could ever
take a taxi by myself. I never imagined I would make my bed out of my own violation, and certainly never that I would (or could) sponga my dorm room.

Strange, how adversity breeds resilience.

I am home briefly for my brother's Bar Mitzvah, (a memoir in itself, I assure you) and then staight back to Israel. I do anticipate that my second beginning will treat me with a kindness akin to its predecessor, but wish me luck all the same. And if the e-mail function on blogger works as I hope, I may be able to update with some modest frequency.

Oh... I said I would tell you of any updates from "Horizons." I got an e-mail saying that unfortunately they couldn't use my peice, though they did encourage me to send it in elswhere.

I guess I'm officially a writer now!

(no subject)

And we return for a brief testing session...